planning mode
dating scene
When one relationship ends and another begins, someone is usually left with feelings of anger, regret, or pain. Depending upon the nature of the relationship, sometimes issues may continue to arise when one person deals with their ex. Whether it is a divorce or a parting of ways among a couple that was dating, knowing how to handle and deal with your ex can have an impact on your future relationships. Some people are fortunate in the sense that when their relationship ends they are able to move forward without ever having to interact with their ex again. However, if there are children in the relationship, or if you share common friends, you might find that dealing with your ex is something that you will have to learn to live with.
When dealing with an ex girlfriend or boyfriend, it is important to keep your emotions in check and remain neutral when interacting with them. If your ex continually tries to push your buttons or makes comments to try an initiate a response from you, ignoring those remarks is your best line of defense. It is also a good idea if you are involved in a new relationship to discuss your ex with your new partner. You don’t need to go into every detail regarding every incident that took place, but if you and your ex share common friends, it isn’t fair for your new partner not to be aware of this. If you keep your ex secret from your new partner, you may instill a sense of distrust and find that your new relationship becomes strained. Though you may feel comfortable associating with your ex, your new partner may not. Respect is the basis for every healthy relationship. Since you are in a new relationship, you should have more respect for your new partner’s feelings and if being around your ex makes your partner uncomfortable, you should honor your new partner’s wishes.
Many people may think that the ideal situation is to be friends with their ex. However, it may be better to remain friendly with your ex, but reserve friendships for those whom you haven’t been intimate with. As long as ex lovers try to be friends and participate in activities as friends, there will always remain the lingering hope that things may change and a relationship may ensue. In fact, your ex may have ulterior motives for trying to prolong a friendship. If you have no interest in being romantically involved with your ex, it is best to make your feelings known and then move on with your life.
If you're dating someone who is associating with their ex, you may feel overwhelming jealousy. The best course of action is to discuss your feelings with your partner. By letting him or her know how you feel you will know that you have done all that you can to express your feelings. If your partner continues to associate with his or her ex knowing how you feel, then you may need to rethink your partner’s commitment to the relationship. However, there are certain situations that will require your partner to associate with their ex if they have children together. It is impossible to ask your partner to have no associations with his or her ex when they share children together. Again, communication is the best line of defense to make sure that your feelings are known and understood. Also, try to understand where your partner is coming from as well. By working through the issues involving the ex together, you can build a strong and enduring relationship.


(On April 10th, 2007 at 12:33 am)
hmmmmm. maybe it's time for me to re-think some things…..
(On July 14th, 2007 at 10:31 am)
sighh i broke up with my bf and got a new one on 7/7/07 .. sighh my bfs runing his life.. taking drugs cutting himslef , smoking , always getting drunk.
its really hard for me ..