You and your significant other recently ended the relationship. You’re hurt, sad, angry, and just don’t know how you will ever get over the break up. There are very few things in life that can be as painful as a broken heart. So what should you do when faced with such a difficult time in your life?
The first thing any break up will do is cause emotional and mental distress. Therefore, the best thing to do is to talk to somebody about what you’re going through and how you’re feeling. Venting out will help to release all the built-up stress, anger, sadness, and worries. If you find yourself uncomfortable speaking to somebody, write it down on a sheet of paper, in a personal diary or journal. The worst thing you can do is to internalize all of the negative feelings. It is so important to just let it all out.
Because you’re emotionally susceptible during this time, do not play the “Let’s try to be friends” game. This will only make things harder on you. You will never get over somebody if you do not have time away from that person to recover. This also means deleting your ex’s contact information from your phone, email, instant messenger, and Myspace account. You’ll only end up foolishly and regretfully drunk dialing him/her one night, or sending a pathetic email. The instant messenger and Myspace account is especially dangerous because you will end up spying on your ex. Furthermore, get rid of everything that will remind you of your past relationship. For example, avoid going to places where you will likely have a run-in with your former partner, get rid of old emails, love letters, pictures, etc. Reminiscing about the past won’t bring your ex back. It will only harbor greater heartache and animosity.
One of the biggest mistakes people make after a bad break up is to jump into another relationship. Some do it to get their former loves jealous, while others do it because they are feeling lonely. This is a bad idea – you will only end up surfacing your insecurities and selfishness onto your new relationship. Rather, take your mind off the break up by being proactive in your life – pick up a new hobby, or simply enjoy some quality time with friends. Find something positive and fun to do that will keep you occupied during your time of need.
In short, breakups are never easy, but that’s no excuse for you to mope around, feeling sorry for yourself all day. Sure, give yourself a few days to do so, but after that, get up and start fresh. Talk to somebody about how you feel, be heard. That always helps a lot. Remember to avoid any contact with your ex and get rid of old memorabilia from the relationship (out of sight means out of mind). Though you may wonder if you will ever get over the hurt, just have patience. Time heals all wounds – that is a fact.
Courtesy: Elizabeth Nobukuni