Comments on: Is Your Relationship Moving Too Fast?

By: Don't know what to do

Don't know what to do — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 04:45:58 +0000

We've been dating for 2 and half months. I love him. He mentioned marriage and said I love you first. We agreed to get married soon. Well we had a first discussion which was tideous and has now developed into friction. I thought about it a lot. I don't want to breakup, but to slow it down. Now he's hurt! And doesn't understand. I didn't mean to hurt him, but I feel this is the right thing to do.
I feel like he's telling me either change my mind to the way it was or forget it. IDK….

By: Diego

Diego — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 13:06:17 +0000

tk -

You need to back off with the demands brother. You cannot force her to do anything and if you try you'll only push her further away. So, telling her you do not want a "phone relationship" and getting mad at her over little things like punctuality is going to do you more harm than good.

I've been down this road before and, like you, I would easliy get upset and hurt if there were even a *hint* of her losing interest in me. The truth is, If she's going to lose interest it's going to happen no matter what. So keep your self-respect and if she's telling you things need to slow down then you have to back off. Let her tell you when she's ready to pick it up again. Find some otther things to do in the meantime and keep yourself occupied.

By: tk

tk — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 03:48:32 +0000

Ive been talking with this gal for almost two weeks now. Weve hung out 4-5 times since. I keep telling her i want to hang out everyday i talk with her but sometimes it doesnt go down that way. I like her a lot and i get upset that when we do talk, she tells me she would call me back sometimes around a certain time but then doesnt get back to me until hours later or say she'll call me in the morning but calls me at 12-1. I told her i hate and wont have a phone relationship.. We always joke around about what couples would talk about but she told me that things r going too fast.. I dont know how fast is too fast in a relationship.. Please any tips to make me slow this relationship down. Sorry but theres more details if any would like to know but i hate typing on an ipod.

By: Shay

Shay — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 19:10:40 +0000

I have been burned before plenty of times too because sometimes I failed to see what was helpful verses what is harmful. But I have learned from mistakes and am still learning.

Do you feel like it is too fast? Most of us(me included) who find forums like this are asking the same question because something inside of us is warning us. So we look for confirmation.

Is the "family gathering" and "week vacation" two different things? If so, wait on the vacation and decide for yourself if you want to meet his family.

And just remember that a guy will only go as fast as you let him. If you want to slow down, slow down. A man that is for you, will meet you in the middle. (very true). I am in a similar situation.

And congrats on not having sex yet.I have seen the downfall of that enough times in my past experiences. The last thing you want to do is have sex before you are completely sure of him. You have made it one month, let's go another =). (REMEMEBER:ALL THIS IS JUST MY OPINION) Time is your best friend in relationships. [LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK]

By: LeLe

LeLe — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 17:58:38 +0000

I have been dating this guy for about a month
and even though we have not had sex he wants to introduce me to his family in upper east coast and take a week vacation with me already. I have been burned before. Is this considered moving too fast

By: Shay

Shay — Wed, 20 May 2009 15:19:26 +0000

Dear AusEz,

I have been talking to Tunisian man and I was wondering the same if they are really quick to talk about love. I have only known this guy for a short time and he tells me he loves me. I enjoy his company also but I have had to tell him that it is moving too fast for me and that we need to slow it down.

I also met a couple from that part of the country where they married after three months. The wife said that that is how it is sometimes in the Arabic world. She is happily married but she told me to be cautious about it all.

By: rachael

rachael — Thu, 14 May 2009 16:32:26 +0000

Dear AusEz,
I think you know what you're doing. You got the signal in your head that was a little off.. and it is. But you are also factoring in his age and culture, which does make a difference. But this is my advice, stay wary. That is very, very quick to say something like that. Do you know if it just slipped out? Or after saying it, did he want a response from you? That would make a huge difference.

By: AusEz

AusEz — Thu, 14 May 2009 04:04:29 +0000

I met the guy ive just started dating a few months and we've hung out a little bit, but only started dating two weeks back. It just sort of happened one night after going out for dinner. Then after 3 dates, hes dropping me home and as im getting out of the car he tells me he loves me. Yes, warning lights flashing and going off!! Other then this he is completely normal and nice and I love being around him. I said to him he needs to get to know me before he can say this, and am just continuing on as normal and hanging out with him. He is Iranian so ive been trying to figure out if its a cultural thing too and or age, he is 32, I am 24 and Australian. I figure just give it time and see where it goes.

By: SiiLver

SiiLver — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 01:54:33 +0000

Well going to fast in a relationship is not healthy. You might get bored of the person, And it might result in a cheating matter or a horrible break up. But I've been dating my boyfriend for like a month. I've had sexual relations with him after five days. Adn honestly I know he loves me. I love him. BUt I have my douts now. We went way to fast.

But also in differnt outlooks. Marriage can always be reversed. But why would you commit to somone then wanna un-do everything. Yeah I'm only 15 but I got a head on my shoulders I had to grow up fast. And love is a great thing to have. But don't rush it. Once you do everything it gets old.

And Sophie honestly. I know what you're going through and it sucks I think my boyfriend likes me more then I do. We rushed everything. Kissing honestly isn't that big of a deal. Just if things don't work with him move on. Many men in the sea.

Also now I think my boyfriend is cheating on me. So don't rush everything. Don't be in my position.

By: Sophie

Sophie — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 08:25:50 +0000

Maybe I worry too much… But I've been going out with a guy for about two weeks and we've already started kissing and… I feel that it is all a bit too fast… Then I start having doubts… like maybe he likes kissing more than just being with me…. And then I think that he likes me more than I like him… Sorry I'm really just all over the place…