planning mode
dating scene
It seems women are always trying to figure out men. They never seem to know what men are looking for in a woman. From makeup and beauty tips to mannerisms, women often struggle with the concept of what men are looking for. Often, the focus becomes directed at physical appearance, and many women go through a number of concerns on outward looks. However, when it really comes down to it, men are looking for more than just a pretty face. Of course, this is an enhancement to the package, but if a woman has a terrible attitude, her man won't stick around for very long. Here are the top qualities that men look for in women.
First, men look for women that have positive outlooks, cheery dispositions, and beautiful smiles. No one wants to be around a woman who is grumbling, complaining, or miserable and men are no exception. Men are attracted to women who are happy, smile, and know how to act pleasantly. When you first meet a man that you are attracted to, be sure to flash him a dazzling smile, and show off your sense of humor. You'll be amazed at how attractive he'll find you to be.
Men may realize that they want a lover, but a smart woman understands that a man needs his partner to also be his best friend. If you want to be the apple in your man's eye, you will need to let him know that he is your best friend. Not only this, but you should also let him know that you respect and value his opinion. One of the best ways to accomplish this is by being a great listener. The more you listen to what your man has to say, the more he'll believe that you really are attracted to him. The fastest way to shut your man down is to ignore him or not listen to what he has to say. This doesn't mean dozing off while he's talking with the occasional, "Yes, ok, sure…" either. You need to acknowledge what he is saying back to him, and let your body language express the fact that he has your undivided attention.
Finally, it would be erroneous to think that men aren't attracted to physical beauty. No matter what your best or worst features are, a smart woman knows how to enhance her best characteristics and minimizes her flaws. This can be accomplished through make-up tricks and tips. This isn't your usual make-up application either. If you browse through make-up artist books, you'd be amazed at what type of tricks you can learn. You can minimize a large nose; make close-set eyes appear larger. Blend scars, or even hide birthmarks. With a little bit of time, and practice, you can conceal any flaws that you have and maximize your best features. Additionally, men are attracted to women by the way they dress. Taking the time to find the clothes that best compliment your natural shape is one of the best ways to stand out from the rest of the crowd. However, once you realize how important inner beauty is to a man, you'll find that working on those characteristics should be the priority.
(On February 5th, 2008 at 6:05 pm)
Ijust loved the advice titled what qualities men look forin women…I'm 25 and I have very little dating experience so this really helped…I was starting to think I was hopeless ha ha but every quality you mentioned are all qualities I have been told to have…thanks
(On February 23rd, 2008 at 6:19 pm)
well. such a nice advice for women who are single out there. i have to say that i'm totally agree with all the qualities that you have mention above. for me. you just have to be yourself.
(On May 30th, 2008 at 2:31 am)
i agreefully with the advice you have given,am really attracted to one lady by the way she dresses.her inner beauty is just excellent i can not compare to any lady who i have come across.
(On July 5th, 2008 at 11:56 am)
Excellent Advice! Judging from the advice Im doing everything right so its a possibility I 'he' may not be the one…convincing appreciation of 'me' is few and far between.
Thanks
(On October 29th, 2008 at 8:40 pm)
thanks! i'm glad that there are people out there who are willing to talk about things like that in a less-than-shallow way.
(On November 20th, 2008 at 11:04 pm)
It would be so much easier to generalize.. but I think when someone is attracted to another for no specific reason, they don't really take all those minor things under consideration.. no one needs to change themself to fit into another person's "ideal" but just be themself and hope the man in front can see through all the clutter
(On March 11th, 2009 at 9:03 am)
Man, the hunter, has a mental image of the desired ideal woman and he is always using his eyes to search for her, the same way he would hunt a zebra or mastodon. Men hunt visually. That is why men enjoy pictures of women so much. Women know that men prefer young, good looking, healthy females, so women use makeup to conceal signs of aging and poor health. A youthful healthy body is emphasized in every way possible. The 26 billion dollar beauty aids industry relies on women's need for products to make them appear to be young, healthy and fertile. Clothes, makeup, hair, high heel shoes, facial gestures, and body movements are used in ways to emphasize femaleness, healthiness and sexual maturity to get the attention of men. Add to that some outright flirting and males of all ages will follow them to get some action!
(On March 11th, 2009 at 9:22 am)
he following is descriptive of men's needs as programmed in their DNA from evolutionary selection choices by ancestors over the past million years or so. Our ancestors lived in a world that was dangerous and very different than our world is today. However, much of the ancient male programming for mate selection that worked best for our earliest male ancestors is still used by men. And it shows in our body language even today!
This article will now focus on how in today's world our 'old brain' is still programmed for living, surviving and raising offspring in ancient times nearly a million years ago. This 'old brain' and its DNA programming are still strong influences on every man's relationship with women today.
(On March 11th, 2009 at 9:29 am)
When it comes to matters of a sexual nature, it all depends on viewpoint—his or hers!
by Lester A Kirkendall, Ph.D.
Dr. Kirkendall, Professor of Family Life at Oregon State University, is author of “Sex Education as Human Relations,” “Premarital Intercourse and Interpersonal Relationships,” and many other writings.
Men and women cannot look at sex in the same way, but they are only dimly aware of this fact. The fact of being male or female means, inevitably, that sex will be seen from different points of view.
Nor does this promise to change! So long as men produce only the sperm which begins the entire reproductive process, and so long as women bear the children, these differences will exist.
Physically, women can become victims of a sexual mistake: they can become pregnant. As a result girls are protected and supervised more strictly than boys from a very early age.
As a consequence, girls very often resent these restrictions and the fact that boys have greater freedom and more privileges. Some of the bitterness and some of the hard feelings between the sexes which appear later in life arise from just this situation.
Generally a boy can have the key to the house, leave and return home without being closely questioned, walk the streets after dark, and set his own hours. A girl can not.
Puberty, or the coming of physical maturity, affects boys and girls differently. Once menstruation begins, the girl faces a monthly event which will influence a number of her activities. Menstruation is a more serious matter for some girls than others, but for all girls it brings an awareness of sex and the significance of the reproductive processes which differs from that of boys.
At best, for girls, menstruation is something to be attended to; it is probably much of the time a nuisance, and for some even a disturbing or a miserable event.
Boys? Well, they may have nocturnal emissions if they are not masturbating too frequently for this to happen. But these in no way upset their routine. If a boy wants to play football next week, he doesn’t have to check his calendar. The need for relating his activities to the functioning of his reproductive system never occrurs to him.
Intercourse for an intelligent girl aware of her own physiology can hardly be entered in the same casual way a boy can enter it. A boy can be almost certain of finding physical pleasure and achieving an orgasm; a girl is less likely to experience this pleasure.
If conception should result from casual intercourse, the boy’s part is done; the girl’s is only begun. Without doubt there are some men who are parents without knowing it; one can be sure this is not true for women.
With pregnancy there are many obvious developments for the girl. She experiences a change in her figure. There is the problem of clothes, the matter of nutrition for the developing child, and the difficulty (in the later stages of pregnancy) in moving about. There may be fear of the physical consequences of giving birth.
If the pregnancy is outside marriage, and if the relationship was casual, the woman is almost entirely on her own except as family and friends can, and will, help. Her sexual partner is out of the picture; he may not even know what is happening.
Even in marital pregnancy the husband has difficulty in really becoming a vital part of the experience. One evidence of this is the efforts of family life education organizations to help husbands become more nearly partners in the process of pregnancy and childbirth.
There is no choice, however, on the part of the mother. She is a part of it whether she wants to he or not—and there is no getting out of it.
The same things which have been said about the relation of the male and female to pregnancy can be said with reference to childbirth. It is something the father can participate in only at secondhand.
With childbirth comes the production of milk, nursing and car- ing for the child. This means still another change in figure, and a prolonged period of confinement. With pregnancy, childbirth and the care of children comes a restriction of movement not experienced by men.
The amount of lifting and carrying which a mother does in caring for a child before he can walk, if computed in foot – pounds of work, would doubtless mount to a surprising figure.
In the case of a wanted pregnancy, most women find all this a joy. They are fulfilling a speical function in a very different way than a man can. This does not change the point, however. Intercourse, conception, pregnancy, childbirth and child care are still matters which have a different significance for men and women, and result in their having different feelings and attitudes toward sex.
The points which have been discussed thus far relate to the early or middle years of life. Toward the latter part of life comes the menopause, and it too is experienced differently by the two sexes. I often ask both men and women if there is a male menopause. Replies range all the way from those who are sure there is, to those who are sure there is not. This uncertainty does not exist, however, in regard to the female menopause. Everyone is clearly aware of its existence.
So the different functioning of the reproductive system produces differences in sexual attitudes and behavior throughout the lives of i men and women. If nothing more than physiology was involved, the two sexes would have to look at sex and sexual participation in different ways. But more is involved.
Around these differences which result from physiology is a network of social practices which further divide the sexes so far as attitudes toward sex are concerned.
One of the most obvious of these ways is the double standard. Under the double standard women have always been more harshly critieized for sexual experimentation and participation than men are. Men are able to take part in casual relationships with little or no criticism. Their activities may be accepted indulgently as “sowing their wild oats.” Such behavior on the part of women is much more severely condemned.
These attitudes are changing. however, and it is quite possible that the double standard will gradually disappear. In fact, Dr. Ira L. Reiss in his study Premarital Sex Standards in America feels that this is exactly what is happening.
Still we can be sure that the biological difference, which can never be erased, will mean that men and women can never look at sexual functioning, the sexual relationship, and the production of children in exactly the same way.
This means that sex education should be much more than providing facts about reproduction. Parents and teachers who wish to provide young people with a good sex education need to be aware of the problems and feelings of both males and females. Most people lack a keen awareness of the problems of the other sex.
For a good sex education then, both men and women need to have a hand in the sex education of both boys and girls. But before they begin they would do well to educate each other — in all due respects, and apart from the children.
(On May 15th, 2009 at 4:58 am)
all are mad
(On September 17th, 2011 at 12:24 pm)
I will say this article is very helpful.. But I agree with another commenter. If a man knows what he is looking for in a female other than outer beauty than there should be no need for we as woman to have to change ourselves just to be seen and otherwise loved.. And the same refers to men just the same.. First impressions are important and upon that being yourself is top priority. This society has otherwise alter our minds as both males and females to believe that outer beauty is most important and that we must hide our flaws just to find and keep a mate/companion/lover…