planning mode
dating scene
Since the 50s, Americans have grown accustomed to moving away from home once they finished school and found a decent job, usually before they hit their 21st birthdays. However, I’ve been noticing a trend over the last few years that more and more people are opting to hang out with mom and dad longer and longer for a myriad of reasons – be it the astronomical student loan repayments, car loans, the lack of those aforementioned decent jobs or simply to save up for a down payment on a house. In fact, it isn’t all that rare anymore to hear about people who are still living at their childhood home into their late 20s and even 30s, and with what happened with the housing market, many people are finding themselves having to move back into their childhood bedrooms just to keep from being homeless. With all this in mind, should the rest of us who have moved onward and upward and have kept our heads above water look down upon the folks who haven’t?
Now granted, there sure are a lot of slackers out there leeching off their parents… still getting stoned in the basement, munching away on cheese puffs while jamming out on Guitar Hero, working just enough to get by and expecting the world to revolve around them. You can usually spot these types of jokers at the bar from a mile away – their orange stained fingers clutching cheap cans of beer is a dead giveaway! In this day and age however, I think these losers are now becoming the minority, again thanks to the high cost of living. The way I see it, we need to dig just a little bit deeper and find out the reason, albeit in a subtle way.
If someone is living at home helping to care for an elderly parent or is trying to better themselves in one way or another, then these people are certainly not “losers” for being good, honest and responsible citizens. Think about it: if the reason is for caring for her dad with Alzheimer’s instead of putting him in a nursing home, wouldn’t you agree, without even meeting this hypothetical woman, that she is probably the sweetest girl in the world who would never cheat on you? Also, if the reason is to pay off college debt and save up for a house, then I would actually see a guy like that as a major catch. After all, who wouldn’t want to date and especially marry someone who comes into a relationship without any financial burdens and would most likely never have any in the future? And if it’s simply because his or her job downsized, then reading the want ads at mom’s kitchen table is certainly better than sleeping in a car, especially if it isn’t paid for!
Therefore, cut them some slack and find out why before you make a split second judgment call. You just might be pleasantly surprised!

(On April 17th, 2008 at 1:37 pm)
All the shame behind living at home with parents at an advanced age is related to American ideals of consumption and greed. People in this country are taught from a very young age that unless they have their OWN massive home, pimped out AMG Benz, etc., they're LOSERS. This American ideal was shaped in a time when their were lots of high paying union factory jobs and cheap homes to buy. Times have changed for sure. Living with the family in the same home is a great way to conserve resources, space and money. I envy those who still live with their family's, truly. If you live with mom and dad you can still be a playa. All you gotta do is learn some basic carpentry so you can soundproof your walls, install doors with combo locks, and add an escape hatch/contraption for unworthy or secret guests.